How Ace Became My Service Dog

I had never planned on getting a service dog. I never thought I needed one. Service dogs, in my mind, were for people with visible medical conditions. How could a dog help someone with Fibromyalgia?

In fact, the thought of getting one seemed almost absurd. My skin felt like it was on fire at the touch of a paw. Even my cats had to be kept from walking across me—what most people felt as a gentle knead, I experienced as searing pain. That’s how Fibromyalgia is diagnosed: pressure points that trigger burning sensations. A doctor pushed on mine, and pain lingered for minutes. As a child, my brother used to poke me; it hurt then, but it was acute. Now, as an adult, it lingers. I still joke that I finally put a stop to it with “doctor’s orders.”

I had two teenagers who desperately needed direction and love and I was suffering from my own ailments. Caring for teenagers at the age of 28, was beyond my level of expertise. I was not big on the dream to get married and have children of my own. I wanted to be like Tomb Raider. Even more, I had just been retired out of the Navy and anyone who knows a Virgo, knows that we are type A’s who love to work. We don’t need praise; we just need status, tasks, and to have purpose to demonstrate our skills. We do not like to work in front of the crowd, but behind the curtain making sure that the show is a success. I know people who would love to retire right now. To me, this is a death sentence. You retire and stop working, you die shortly after. Fortunately, I had my girls and I think God orchestrated this. Which I will talk about how this came about in the next post.

For right now, I had Ace, and he was a sick puppy. I asked Petland, what breeder did they receive him from because he was really sick! If I had not been home 24/7 to watch over him, I think he would have died. The statement word for word from the Petland worker, “Oh, if he’s sick, you can replace him for another puppy!” I was stunned, that was not the response that I was expecting. My words almost caught in my throat, but I manage to say it. “He’s not a broken toy!” How am I going to replace something that has been brought into my care? How can I just abandon this pup, just because he is not in good health? If anything, he needs me more than ever. I knew what would happen to him if I had given him up for another, healthier version. A pup that is not profitable would have been put down through euthanasia. I didn’t need her to tell me that, to know the truth. They are a business; they need goods to sell that are marketable. I kept him and made them pay for his vet bills for 3 months, as according to their pet plan promises. I had to drive a one and a half hours to nowhere country of Illinois, but dang it! My adopted baby needs me!

Everyday I watched over him as he battled diarrhea, fevers, and low potassium & sodium. I gave him a brown liquid to stop the diarrhea. He was diagnosed with Giardia, Hookworm, roundworm, and a cold. He was not interested in eating, so the best I could do was freeze low sodium chicken broth for him to get his electrolytes up and lower his temperatures. After three months of hardcore medications, it was finally suggested to put him on a grain-free diet. This worked and he no longer had diarrhea. But another concern crept in…

I sat on the couch playing Diablo on the computer and stopped to watched as my teen girl ran her barefoot from his chest to his gentlemen area. He reacted with a growl, looking at her with distrust. I was perplexed to why she would do this and his reaction as a placid puppy. I questioned her at what I had just saw and she smiled sheepishly, replying. “It’s my fault, I accidentally kicked him there the other day.” Anxiety struct me and my fears were affirmed. Even though my teen had had a lapse of judgment from the promptings of the Holy Spirit. This did not mean Ace was safe within my home. He was a companion puppy; he couldn’t go wherever I went.

He was now well enough and showed a lot of promise as a service dog. I laid in bed one morning, plagued with the total exhaustion that pain causes on the body. I heard Ace make his morning plea for the toilet call. He was young, but he already knew the rules and how to let me know. I didn’t know if he understood but I explained to him, “Baby, I give you permission to go anywhere and I will pick it up when I am able to.” Later that day, I woke up to at least to feed him for his daily dinner. I looked for his mess and found it in front of the toilet in the bathroom. When Asia was a kitten and she couldn’t get to her kitty litter for one reason or another. She would pee on my feet while I was sleeping… So, for my husky puppy of 15 weeks old to go to the potty in front of the toilet. I felt he was really intelligent. We understood each other even though we did not speak the same language.

We went on our healthy walks, prompted by his needs. As a puppy, he explored the world with his mouth as every puppy does. And sometimes he would pick things up that I really did not want him to eat. Cigarette buds were on the top of the list. Food that would upset his sensitive stomach or dead animal carcasses that I didn’t want to touch with my barehand. But I never grabbed a single thing out of his mouth. I simply asked, “What do you got there?” He would set the thing down and look up at me, as if to say. “Look, see what I have?” In exchange for what he had, I gave him a treat or toy to replace it. This technique would later backfire. I had a beautiful juicy steak, takeout from a local restaurant and Ace wanted a piece of my salted, flavored steak. I simply said no because it was seasoned and I didn’t want to upset his sensitive stomach. He walked away and I heard him rummaging around in the next room. He soon came back with a pair of swimming goggles and dropped them at my feet. “Ah, touché”, I said. I could not go back on our arrangement after our trust had been put in place. I cut a small piece and washed it under water to try and get any seasoning off before giving it to him. Now I make sure to buy meat, that I can cook without seasoning and have it ready for the exchange. But like any unique spoiled husky, his palate has changed for better things. He is a huge fan of cream cheese. He has turned down bacon, peanut butter, ice cream, and whip cream, but he never says no to cream cheese, beef or chicken. I think it is his way of learning what he handle. After all, he is very intelligent.

On one occasion, my mom came to visit me in Wisconsin. She was talking to him, but he was busy eating his treat and not looking at her when she said his name. Finally, maybe out of frustration, she said “He is just an airhead.” Ace stopped chewing on his treat. Eyebrows furrowed, he slowly looked up at her as if hurt. She didn’t even say it in a mean tone, more like as a matter of fact. But his expression made me feel that he understood she had insulted him. “Mom, he understood you! Quick, apologize!” Her eyebrows raised, “Oh! Sorry, you’re not an airhead!” He was satisfied with the apology, licked his nose and went back to chewing on his treat.

I went online and ordered him a training vest and went under the laws of The American’s with Disability Act, ADA to train him. He knew things without me teaching him. He knew what we were saying before he was 1 years old. He knew my expectations for him and somehow, I knew how to communicate what I needed from him. He helped me to overcome my physical pain by redirecting my focus and relieving stress. Stress has a major impact on the body, especially when you have fibromyalgia. His needs got me out more, friendly strangers became my friend and I wasn’t alone anymore and I started to smile & laugh more than I had ever had in my life. I became active again and reversed the growing anxiety I was developing when being out in public spaces. Later on, he would tell a woman on the stairs that she was going to have a seizure.

However, to be clear, training wasn’t perfect. I did have to use various methods to teach him. Dogs learn best from other dogs and their language is not that far from wolf mentality. If you didn’t know, huskies are stubborn, derby, and adventurous. It was important for me to use the 80% body language with intent and consistency. Interjecting the human language, I made sure my body was still the main communicator. Most of all, I started to learn about how God loves. Why does God punish us for things that we chose to do? Most people don’t like that fact, but when Ace ran towards the street or went across when I said wait. I had to pull him in and make sure he understood, using my eyes, facial expression and leaning over his head & neck. He lost off leash privileges for an extent of time. Sometimes I would omit a growl to show that I was very upset with him when he bullied a dog with others at the dog park. He was to listen to me, because if he did not obey like a service dog. Then I could not take him everywhere with me. For the dangers of the roads, I practiced in quiet areas with very low traffic. It didn’t matter that there was no car, I needed to know that he would listen when I said no or wait. Has God ever said these things to you? And then you went ahead anyways? Were there consequences and then you were mad at God for NOT letting you do what you want or NOT preventing the bad things from happening? Because I know I have! When I really analyzed my thought process with different circumstances, it was clear to me what I wanted and had expected to happen.

I have a better question for you. Have you ever loved something or someone so much that you wanted the best for them? That it made you angry when they put themselves in dangerous positions? Ace didn’t see what the big deal was, there was no danger, right? But let’s say I just let him continue with his actions without stopping and double checking. I remember being in bootcamp on base at a pedestrian crosswalk. I waited for the car to stop, and they gave a hand gesture to go ahead and cross. I took one step and felt a sense to be sure before taking another step. I looked the opposite way as a car sped right past me. If I had not hesitated with the second step, I would have been hit. I have words for that driver, but I am not going to write it out here. I have words for the truck driver that killed Spencer, but that doesn’t change what happened. What matters is that we listen to someone who has the power to see into our future and knows about the dangers in life. FYI, great training trick I used to train Ace was prayer to God to tell Ace what I needed from him. Even though it hinders what Ace naturally wants to do, to run away, explore, and be free. There was so much more opportunity for me to meet his needs while we were together. If I couldn’t trust him, he would be put on a leash to prevent him from being lost or hit by a car. Yes, he has free will, but I prefer for his sake to choose to listen to me because I love him and don’t want to lose him. Do you understand how God loves you?

You might think, well I don’t do anything that will kill me! Let me tell you what Jesus said about the thought being the action. He said if you lust in thought, you have committed adultery. If you hate someone, then you have murdered. Someone who has had an affair, didn’t accidentally just happened to have sex with someone. It started with a thought, then they festered the thought. Let’s move forward to after the action. King David had committed adultery & then murder to cover up his affair. In Psalms, we get the sense that this affected his relationship with God. He felt guilty. Yes, he grieved the Holy Spirit, but guess what Satan likes to do? He likes to take advantage of your sin and condemn you. God says repent, Satan says that is who you are, you will never change, God can never forgive you, you are better off dead. We all die, this is 100% guaranteed. But people forget that eternal life is 1 heartbeat away. You ever hear that saying, “Death is only the beginning.” True death comes from the separation of oneself from God, the life giver, the Creator. You can be alive in this body but dead spiritually. Your actions and thoughts matter. They definitely matter to God, who loves you more than how much I love Ace. Which I cannot even conceive. There is just some people I generally do not like, but God has taught me that love is important. I didn’t know how to love until God first loved me. Do you know how to love?

Nathan said to King David after the king repented, “The Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die.” King David was on a path of dying, but despite the things he did God took away his sin when there was repentance.